


the touch of your hand lets me know that you need me

by thekaidonovskys



Series: Becoming Three [5]
Category: Pacific Rim (2013)
Genre: Awkward Conversations, Cuddling & Snuggling, Cutesy, Implied Sexual Content, M/M, Multi, Polyamory
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-28
Updated: 2014-07-28
Packaged: 2018-02-10 17:57:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,243
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2034594
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thekaidonovskys/pseuds/thekaidonovskys
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“M’not cute,” Newt says, before promptly burying his face in Tendo’s shoulder and completely proving Tendo’s point.</p>
            </blockquote>





	the touch of your hand lets me know that you need me

**Author's Note:**

> Originally posted by Tumblr user thekaidonovskys

It becomes pretty clear right from the get-go that Hermann Gottlieb does  _not_ like talking about sex. 

Oh, he’ll do it, of course. He’s brilliant at talking Tendo through things, he makes his own wishes clear, and while everything is a little bit clinical and formal, it gets communicated effectively enough. He just doesn’t have the same ease of joking around, and certainly never touches on anything that could come near dirty talk. Newt and Tendo respect the boundary, don’t push it, and save their innuendo for each other. 

So that’s all fine.

What takes Tendo a little longer to learn is how much Newton Geiszler does  _not_ like talking about the more innocent ways that they all touch each other.

Because it’s not obvious at first - mainly because Tendo’s the one finding his way, the one asking for hugs and to hold their hands and to cuddle late at night, and Hermann and Newt are the ones simply needing to say yes. Which they do, constantly and consistently, and soon enough it becomes as easy as breathing. They all love to be close to one another and, with Newt and Tendo as clingy as they are (even though Hermann is  _this_ close to banning the word altogether), there’s certainly a lot of touch that goes on. Most of the time they don’t even need to ask, just curling themselves around their chosen cuddling partner or reaching out for a hand which will nearly always be there.

But sometimes they do have to ask. Sometimes it takes convincing Hermann to put his book down, or Newt to settle in one spot for awhile, or Tendo to put away his laptop - which aren’t difficult things to do, and requests are nearly always instantly granted, but it does involve asking.

And that, it turns out, is where Newt falters. 

Tendo doesn’t quite see it at first. There’s only one occasion which catches his attention - an evening where both he and Hermann have had to bring work home, leaving Newt to fend for himself. He does alright for awhile, finding something to occupy himself on his own laptop, but eventually he’s clearly bored and looking for attention as he slides closer to Hermann, resting his head on his shoulder. “Hermann,” he says.

Hermann smiles a little without looking up. “Yes, darling?”

Newt sighs, as if that isn’t the answer he’s looking for. “ _Hermann_ ,” he repeats, his tone a little plaintive. “Please?”

“Do I have to make you use your words?” But Hermann closes his laptop, putting it aside. “Come on then,” he says, and a second later he has a lapful of Newt, curled around him quite contentedly. Hermann smiles down at him, then picks up a book with his free hand, giving Tendo an amused glance before beginning to read.

Tendo naturally finds it adorable, but he doesn’t get the significance until later. 

Not until it’s his turn. He’s curled up in the chair, reading an article about the upgrade to their systems, when Newt gets his attention. “Tendo?” he asks.

“Hm?”

“You should come over here.”

“Should I?” Tendo glances up briefly to see Newt sitting on the couch, watching him. “Why?”

“Because.”

Tendo raises an eyebrow and looks back down at his page. “Compelling reasoning. Try again?”

There’s a long moment of silence, then gentle laughter from Hermann who’s standing in the doorway to the kitchen, clearly attracted by the conversation. “He’s not going to, you know.”

“Do I know?”

Hermann frowns. “Oh,” he says after a second, his tone one of realization. “You  _don’t_ know.”

They’ve got his full attention now. “What don’t I know?” Tendo asks, putting the article aside. “What’s going on here?”

Hermann glances at Newt, who’s actually  _blushing_ , then back to Tendo. “Newton doesn’t ask for the… more innocent pleasures,” he says.

Tendo frowns. “Elaborate?” he asks, not entirely sure what they’re talking about

“Simply put, Newton is as likely to ask to be held as I am to ask to be… fucked.”

Tendo looks at Newt, unable to stop the beginnings of a smile. “Really? You don’t like asking to  _cuddle?_ ”

Newt groans and hides his bright red face in his hands. “Don’t be mean.”

“I’m not.” Tendo uncurls himself and crosses the room to sit down next to Newt, gently tugging his hands away from his face. “I think it’s  _adorable_. I just never realized… but you never have asked, have you?”

Newt shakes his head. He’s still blushing hard and Tendo wants to kiss him badly, but he waits it out, waits for a reply. “I don’t know why,” Newt finally says quietly. “I just don’t like it.”

“ _Aw_ ,” Tendo says softly and wraps his arms around Newt, pulling him into his lap. “It’s okay, beautiful. I’m not gonna make you do something you don’t like. I just think it’s seriously cute.”

“M’not cute,” Newt says, before promptly burying his face in Tendo’s shoulder and completely proving Tendo’s point. 

Hermann’s still watching, and his smile is just as fond as Tendo’s. Tendo tilts his head and Hermann quickly takes the unspoken invitation to join them, wrapping an arm around Tendo’s shoulders and picking up one of Newt’s hands, gently playing with his fingers. “Darling,” he says, his tone amused but soft, “you are adorable. Deal with it.”

Newt makes an unintelligible grumpy noise and stays exactly where he is. Tendo grins at Hermann, who returns it. “Props to you on asking to be fucked as well.”

“I didn’t  _ask_ ,” Hermann retorts immediately. “It just worked as a suitable analogy.”

“I’ll remember it though. You can cash it in at some point.”

He winks and Hermann goes pink. “Okay,” he says quietly. 

Tendo grins, looking between the two of them. “I’ve got both of you blushing now,” he says, a little delighted with the turn of events. “Whoever would have thought that  _I’d_ be the mature one who can talk about sex  _and_  cuddling without going bright red.”

Hermann smiles. “Considering you’re the youngest, too,” he teases. 

“Do  _not_ bring my age into this.”

“It’s only a matter of three years -“

“Lies. It’s two years, eleven months and eight days for you; two years, three months and twenty-eight days for Newt. That’s not three years.”

He realizes he’s said too much when Hermann’s smile grows. “And  _now_ you’re the one blushing,” Hermann says, a bit of triumph in his voice. “Do tell, sweetheart, how you happen to know that information off the top of your head?”

“Eidetic memory and access to the personnel files?” Tendo tries.

“Yeah, but you would’ve had to calculate it,” Newt says, looking up again, and he looks amused too. This is unfair. “Which you clearly have - even I haven’t worked out what the gap is between me and Herms.”

Tendo sighs. “I wanted to feel better, okay?”

The mood changes immediately, all teasing gone. “Better about what?” Newt asks, instinctively curling a little closer.

“Just… I know it’s just a number and all that, but I guess because you’ve both already had to take care of me so much and Hermann always jokes about how it’s like having children instead of partners -“

“Is that something that upsets you?” Hermann asks, his voice sharp and worried. “If it is, I need to know - I should have  _already_ known.”

“No, no, it’s okay,” Tendo soothes quickly. “Honestly. Look, I worked it out on the heels of a bad day, then promptly forgot… well, clearly not  _forgot_ , but stopped thinking about it. I know it doesn’t matter, I know you two don’t care and it’s not like you’re my  _parents_ or anything -“

“You two are more likely to be mine,” Newt points out. 

Tendo smiles. “I’ll give you that. Point is, I’m not upset about it, I haven’t been dwelling on it, I just now happen to have that information and would like it on the record that I am  _not_ three years younger than you.”

Hermann nods. “I’ll accept that, simply because if the gap is not three years, I don’t feel as old.”

“You’re not old,” Tendo argues immediately. 

“Yeah,” Newt chimes in. “You’re distinguished.”

Hermann rolls his eyes. “Brat,” he says, but fondly. “You’re seven months younger than me, darling, so if I’m  _distinguished_  you’re definitely getting there as well. We’re both pushing forty.”

“You’re young at heart,” Tendo says with a wink. “But enough of this - back to the adorable being that is Newt and his inability to ask to be cuddled with.”

Newt groans and hides his face again. “I thought we’d moved on,” he whines. “Do you have to?”

“I do have to,” Tendo says, stroking his fingers down Newt’s back. “Apart from the fact that I need to know what things you’re not going to be asking for, I also like making you blush.”

“Be kind,” Hermann admonishes lightly, but he’s smiling too. “Just because you have no qualms asking for whatever you like.”

Tendo nearly reminds Hermann exactly why he’s capable of asking for everything - because he’s come from a position where he has to, where he has to be explicitly clear about what he wants and needs and _doesn’t_ want - but he’s already killed the mood once tonight and doesn’t want to do so again. So he just smiles back and keeps it soft and gentle. “I’m as kind to Newt as he deserves,” he says. “Which is to say, I’m far  _too_ kind. But in all seriousness, beautiful, I do need to know. Can you tell me or does Hermann have to?”

“Herms?” Newt asks, his voice again muffled in Tendo’s shoulder.

“Of course, darling.” Hermann kisses the back of his hand, then looks back to Tendo. “To put it simply, all the things Newton loves the most are the things he struggles to ask for. To be held, to cuddle -“ and that still sounds so strange coming out of Hermann’s mouth, but equally adorable, “- to… what else? Oh yes, spooning.”

“It’s a weird phrase, okay?”

Tendo chuckles. “You love being the little spoon though.”

“So do you,” Hermann reminds him and Tendo shrugs unapologetically - it’s true. “And, by far the most adorable, Newton doesn’t like to ask for a kiss.”

This one, Tendo has to know more about. So he tucks his hand under Newt’s chin, gently guiding his head back up. “Why?” he asks.

Newt shrugs, blushing hard again. “I don’t know.”

“Are you afraid we’ll say no?”

“No! No, god no, I know you won’t, it’s just…  _weird_.”

“It’s cute,” Tendo says, smiling softly at him. “You can blatantly ask to have your hands tied to the headboard and for me to do all manner of obscene things to you, but you can’t ask to be kissed?”

Newt nods. “Because those things are easy to ask for.”

“Why?”

“Because it’s sex.”

“And sex is different to… intimacy?”

He knows he’s got it when Newt’s eyebrows furrow. “It’s not,” he begins, then falters. “Is it?” he asks a moment later, then sighs. “Oh shit, it probably is.”

“I had wondered that too,” Hermann says gently. “You were raised quite… masculine, weren’t you?”

“I was raised to be a dude, yeah,” Newt acknowledges easily. “And my dad was bitter because of all the stuff he’d fucked up with women, so he taught me to get all the sex I wanted and not to get attached.”

Tendo nods. “So if you started wanting things like kisses or being held, it was that sense of not having control?”

“Obviously I never bought into it because I’m like the most clingy person - clingy in a  _good_ way,” he says quickly in response to Hermann’s glare. “I like to touch, I like to… do things like this. I guess I just subconsciously held on to the fact that asking for it was weak.”

“So the question is, do we try to break that?”

He looks to Hermann, who frowns. “I think, as we do with all things, we work on increasing levels of comfort. Small steps, with no pressure. After all, you aren’t demanding that I vocalize every last detail of what I wish to take part of in bed.”

“That’s true,” Tendo allows. “And I’ve still got my own barriers. Just as long as you’re getting everything you need, beautiful.”

“I am. You’re both wonderful to me.”

“Good.”

Tendo’s about to kiss him, then pauses. After a few seconds, Newt sighs. “Oh god, you’re gonna make me, aren’t you?”

“I won’t make you. I just want to see if you can.”

“ _Tendo_ ,” Newt whines. “Okay,  _fine_. Can I have a kiss?”

And as badly as Tendo wants to tease him and call him out on grammar, he can’t do it. Instead he steadies his hand on Newt’s back and presses a gentle kiss to his lips, allowing Newt to deepen it a little before breaking away. He kisses Newt’s forehead and smiles at him. “You’re precious,” he says softly, “and I love you lots.” He reaches out his other arm for Hermann, drawing him close so Tendo can kiss him as well. “Love you too, gorgeous,” he says. 

“You didn’t make  _Hermann_ ask.”

“Nope. I plan on making Hermann ask for something quite different very soon.”

“I have a free pass,” Hermann reminds him.

Tendo grins. “For one particular activity, yes. Well, I’ll just have to make you want to beg for something else then, won’t I?”

He delights in Hermann’s blush. It’s just so easy.

**Author's Note:**

> The fluff levels are too high.
> 
> Title from "When You Say Nothing At All".


End file.
